Ode to the 2%

I was so sure December was our time.  Which is why, when I wrote this post because I thought my period had started, I was disappointed.  And completely resigned.  I thought, with 98% certainty, that our shot for December was over.

I mean, let's face it: I've been through this enough times to recognize defeat when it was staring me right in the underware...er... face.

But then, a funny thing happened. 

My period stopped.  I had two days of unmistakable something and then... ???. 

I tried really hard not to get too excited, because this also happened in November.  After starting for about 2 days, I had nothing for 36 hours, and then, ta-da!   There it was again, full blast.  (Remember how I talked about a rollercoaster?  This would be why.  Shoot me down, then give me a tiny ray of hope just long enough for me to start getting excited, then shoot me down again.  The complete tripple whammy.)

One day went by.  Nothing.  Then two.  Nothing.  On the third day, I promised myself I would test the next morning.  Of course, being me, I couldn't wait that long. 

I was convinced that if I took a test, my period would start exactly three minutes later.  I mean, that's just how it goes.  So I peed.  And waited with low expectations, but still couldn't quite bring myself to watch that one lonely, disappointing line appear. 

I folded some laundry.  I fiddled with my hair.  Finally, I sat on the side of the bathtub and counted to 60 along with the clock on the wall. 

When I finally grew the guts to look?

UMM.... WHAT?!  I made a second line appear!  I made it say pregnant!!!!!!! 

Faint or not, I know exactly what that second line means!!

When I found out I was pregnant with Leah, I was a whirlwind of trying to set up the perfect surprise.  It involved three different stores, two more pregnancy tests, approximately 12 glasses of water, setting up the video camera and ambushing Casey so I could catch the whole thing on film. 

Ahhh, how much changes after 8 months and a miscarriage. 

This time, I ran down the stairs and threw that soggy little stick unceremoniously in Casey's face, complete with pee still on it.  I couldn't help it.  I had this whole picture of how I would wait until Christmas and surprise him, but the moment that second line appeared, that plan went out the window.  We both danced for joy.  Neither of us washed our hands.   

It's faint, but it's there.  God is faithful and good. 

And I'm pregnant.  :) And really, really glad I didn't take that Nyquil.